There is NO Turkey Bacon in Heaven!

There it sat on the counter in its gelled mysterious form glaring up at me.  Fear gripped me.  This cannot be a good thing.  I mean, look at it!  WHAT is it?  It doesn’t even “sizzle” nor shrink.  As I close my eyes to take that first bite I remember,

“Have I not commanded you?  Be strong and courageous.  Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you where you go.” ~Joshua 1:9

I always imagined that this scripture would be most useful for the young soldier that is about to climb the hill to face the combatant enemy on the other side.  You know, those life or DEATH situations.  I never imagined that it would come in handy for a chubby chic about to eat a foreign substance for the betterment of her health. But there it was, resonating as I was about to take that bite into the dreaded turkey bacon.

Why oh why would they invent turkey bacon?  Why oh why am I forced to chose this option.  Well, the answer to the latter is simple.  I chose to put myself in this situation by over eating in other situations.  See, it’s simple.  Yet, not so simple to fix.

“Then the LORD God said to the woman, ‘What is this you have done?’ The woman said, ‘The serpent deceived me, and I ate.” ~Genesis 3:13

Ah yes!  So familiar.  That is what I used to rely up on also.  It’s not my fault!  I’m too busy to prepare meals, track food and get all sweaty and ruin my make-up.  Make-up isn’t cheap you know! I have things to do, places to be, people to make happy.  But I forgot that while I was running, going and doing my baggage was getting heavier.  And I don’t simply mean the baggage on my caboose.  I mean my spiritual baggage.  I was not taking responsibility and was blaming others or situations for my choices.  I had a choice to be led astray or to resist temptation.  And so do you.  We must honor God by resisting the urges to eat foods that are not part of our weight loss plan.

Here is the silver lining!  Not only do we achieve better health and well-being while we are here, we can go day by day knowing that there is no turkey bacon in Heaven.  That bizarre gelatin mold formed from mysterious parts of a turkey cannot be a Godly thing. I can picture it now.  I walk through those pearly gates and the LORD turns to me and says, “Ahead on your left you will find the A La Carte Zero Calerio Restaurante.  Eat, drink, be merry with your friends and family!”  Well, maybe not in those exact terms.

We must honor the LORD God almighty in ALL that we do including making the right choices for our health.  Give thanks before each meal and ask on a daily basis for the strength and courage to make the right choices so that you may reap the reward of a turkey bacon-less Heaven later.

Taking cookies from a skinny girl....

Before I even begin this, let me just say that I have no desire to offend anyone.  If you read closely, you will see that the person I am poking the most is myself.

I drove home this evening causing even myself disgust.  I had just spent the last hour moving my aging body in directions that it lost the map to several years ago.  I was dripping with sweat and causing even my adoring one boy fan club to scurry quickly away.  But through the fog of my own cloud, I could see more clearly the image of myself.  We all have that image.  The one we see on the inside, that doesn't match the one on the outside.  And there she was, looking more youthful and feeling more fulfilled.

I can't wait for the day that the two images are identical and the disappointing "aw" isn't resounding out of me first thing in the morning.  I can't count the times that I have scurried past a mirror or window without a care in the world, and then I catch my reflection.  It's at that point I find myself asking, who is that?  Because...uh....THAT is NOT me.  But, alas, it is.  Then you pick up your pride and enter into your adult world of work and play.  It is there that you run into "her".

She is the perpetual skinny girl with all the advice in the world regarding how you should better handle your body.  The one that stands over you at lunch smacking on her cookie while reminding you "It's a temple you know."  Uh...yeah...I know.  The not so nice side of you wants to take that cookie and....well, I can't exactly finish that thought.  Taking dieting advice from a skinny girl with no history of weight issues is not only self-defeating, it's down right tasking to the nerves.

Just as taking advice from a Christian that doesn't walk in the word........well.  You follow?  I know I do. God has put this on my heart more and more as I draw closer to opening my office doors.  If we are going to offer the advice, we need to walk the walk and not stand over our friends and family smacking on that cookie.  I believe that when we drop the cookie, our image of ourselves and the image God has of us will merge.  Therefore, making the trip past the mirror in the morning a pleasant awakening.